The nerd herd

Also known as 'the Ring of Faya' here will be listed everything known so far about what is happening inside the brain.Last updated October 20, 2022.

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What is DID?

DID, or Dissociative Identity Disorder (previously known as Multiple Personality Disorder) is a trauma based disorder that revolves around the experience of dissociation and the appearance of 2 or more identities, personalities, or "Alters."DID and OSDD 1 A and B both have "systems of alters" which is the language most use to address all the alters as a whole unit.DID is not role-play, kinning, or spiritually based. Alters are created due to experiencing recurring trauma, originally through the ages from birth up to age 10.Alter creation is not voluntary, and alters are real identities that have their own emotions, reactions, behaviors, and preferences.Alters may behave in negative ways, due to the traumatic history they possess. This behavior needs to be addressed and accounted for by the system as a whole.Alters may form after the age of 10 during times of distress or trauma as the brain now utilizes this as it's main coping technique.Dissociative Amnesia keeps some alters from remembering other alters memories, feelings, even their existences- which is why many systems with DID don't receive proper diagnosis, treatment, or intervention until later in life, if ever.DID and OSDD is generally "covert" meaning hidden. The main purpose of this disorder is to keep the "normal" alters, or the hosts, from experiencing the distress of trauma.After a system finds a safe environment away from trauma, systems may become more "overt" or obvious to family, friends, and possibly others on the "outside."Some alters may feel more comfortable fronting than others, or only comfortable with certain individuals. Some alters may not wish to let others know that it is "them"- preferring to pretend to be another alter, usually the host, instead.(Taken from:

Our wording

I'm not the biggest fan of the way things are 'labeled' in the traditional sense, so I've created my own wording that I feel encompasses us better.We also don't refer to ourselves as a system but as a collective, ensemble, aggregate. We are united, as a team, working together to figure out this messed up world we call our home.We like to say "nerd herd assemble" when we discuss us as a group as we're all quite nerdy in our own way.The entrance in the brain is known as a ‘speakeasy’ where most will chill, drinking, eating or playing games with each other.Some of these roles were ‘made up’ as they were. ‘Empath’, ‘Unknown’, and ‘Mapper’ are roles we created to fit a specific personality.

  • Alternative Personalities (Alter) = Rives or Riven (means ‘tear’ or ‘split’)

  • System = Ensemble, Collective, Aggregate

  • Body = Vessel

  • Host = The Commander

  • Apparently Normal Part (ANP) = The Primary

  • Internet Self Helper (ISH) = Domestic Accomplice or Accomplice

  • Protector = The Partisan

  • Protectors (together) = The High Council

  • Physical Protector = The Savior

  • Emotional Protector = The Ardent

  • Caretaker = The Guardian

  • Gatekeeper = The Safeguard

  • Little = The Slight

  • Persecutor = The Bandit

  • Sexual Alter = The Carnal

  • Mapper = The Surveyor

  • Empath = The Concord

  • Unknown roles = The Alien

Individuals and their dynamics

Here is a list of our personalities, how they interact with each other, and their roles. Not everyone is comfortable with sharing information about themselves.Most individuals will have an 'opposite' which will be listed in their bios.There is a total of 18 in our Collective but 4 have not revealed themselves entirely yet, and 3 currently are learning about their roles.

Aria / Faya- The Commander, Primary

High Council, Commander, Primary.Kama’s Opposite.Faya meaning 'Sunset' or 'Scenery' in Aramaic. Aria has many different meanings in many cultures.Looks very similar to the body. Large dark brown eyes, dark brown, almost black hair, big cheekbones, large nose, small lips. Quite pudgy, and short. Lots of tattoos and piercings. Enjoys wearing plaid. Faya speaks English, French, and Arabic.Aria is the Commander and one of the Primaries of the Nerd herd. What that means is she is ‘out’ the most often. She does her best to protect and care for everyone, making any and all decisions in the best interest of the Collective.

As the Ensemble began to unfold, she learned about all the time she lost as a child, as multiple alters ended up taking up that time for her. All of this has been revealed relatively later in life, making it hard for her to adjust but she is working very hard to work with the Rives. Aria is working on mapping out the Aggregate and where everyone lives and hides.Aria is very loud and outspoken. She has issues discerning what should be kept quiet and what she can happily talk about, causing issues amongst her peers. She has learned over the years what is acceptable and working at it with the help of Kino. She can also be very sarcastic and sass everyone around her in a very light hearted manner.She loves all things pop and nerd culture. From video games, to comics, to anime and manga. She loves Raven from Teen Titans and Crash Bandicoot. Her favourite thing to do is watch horror movies with her friends, and eat crap food.

Astrid - The Primary

High Council, Primary, Accomplice.Noah’s Opposite.Astrid meaning a combination of 'God' and 'Beautiful' or 'Fair' in old Norse. Based on Viking lore, Astrid is a tall, blonde haired woman. She has chubby, pink cheeks, pale skin, large blue eyes. She likes to wear random braids in her hair and tie it up. She likes to wear her leather jacket to most occasions. She is quite tall, sitting around 5’8, 5’9 with a slim, fit build. Astrid speaks English and French.

Astrid is a very no nonsense type of person, like Kino. She is very smart, dutiful, striking, and very independent. She was hardly out or around to begin with until August of 2020 but she has existed for about 17 years. She is very competitive, and works very hard to achieve her goals. Astrid is very emotionally driven, will blame herself if a choice was made wrong and awful consequences came out of it.She will boost up everyone's confidence whenever she can, making the tough decisions that Faya is either unequipped or unable to make herself. She is a very supportive person, and compassionate towards her headmates.Astrid does feel inadequate due to her gender at times. As we were growing up, being a woman in a middle eastern household was tough, and she felt as though she was under-estimated and undermined due to her gender.Although she is very similar to Faya in their personalities, sense of humour, preference in food, she is also quite different. She isn't into nerd culture like Faya but does love mythology, art, drawing, and dancing.Astrid likes to read books, draw, go to art museums, and play with the Slights.

Kino - the partisan

High Council, Partisan, and Safeguard.Seth's Opposite.Kino name meaning is 'Wandering Soul' in Japanese. Japanese/Irish appering. No accent. Standing at 5'4, relatively normal build. Likes to dress professionally, wear skirts or dresses, along with a cardigan. She speaks English, and Japanese.Much like Astrid, Kino is a very no-nonsense type of person. Very blunt and bold when she speaks, she has no fears as to whom will like her or what sort of presence she has around other people. She carries around a lot of responsibility and has no time for joking, horsing, or playing around.

Kino is very perceptive when it comes to reading people, especially new ones who have entered our lives. She is very protective of everyone within the Ensemble and does not like having people around us. She lives by assessing people and determining who will be good to be around, whether that be familial or friendship.Kino is the ‘main’ protector, a Safeguard that she will decide who will ‘come out’ or ‘front’ during specific situations, and will also sort out memories for Faya and Astrid so they can live very simple, normal lives.Although Kino is very pessimistic in her world view and of people in general, she is very loving and sweet when it comes to her headmates. She adores the Slights and will protect them at all costs by keeping them away from situations and making sure they do not experience any new or old traumatic memories.Kino is very confident in herself, and in her abilities. She does have her moments of fear when it comes to meeting new people, which Seth will assist her with, but during ‘normal’ times, she is self assured and self reliant.She enjoys painting, drinking alcohol, jigsaw puzzles, knitting, and playing card games.

Seth - the partisan

High Council, Partisan.Kino's Opposite.Seth meaning 'Appointed' in Hebrew. Speaks with a British accent. Long brown wavy hair with large eyes, one brown and one grey. He has a strong jaw line with some beard fuzz. Described as someone with a stoner/surfer vibe. He likes to wear leather jackets and ripped jeans. Seth speaks English.The first thing you will notice about Seth is his accent, followed by his relaxed demeanor. He is very different from the rest of the Ensemble as he is very ‘chill’. Most have declared that he gives off a ‘stoner’ vibe as he also loves to eat food. Although his demeanor is different, his likes are not. He is very much classified as a ‘nerd’ as he enjoys most things in pop culture, like Faya.Speaking of food, Seth adores meals. He loves to try new dishes, explore different cultures and cuisine. His favourite thing to add to any dish are tomatoes, and mushrooms, the veggies absolutely no one else likes.Although Seth gives off a very relaxed vibe, he is very much like a mother bear. He is very protective of everyone within the Nerd Herd and will shield them from any dangers that may come their way. That is why he is also a Partisan along with Kino and Orion. He may not be a physical or emotional protector, but he is very caring, and sweet.Seth was one of the first boys to emerge in our Aggregate. He was born out of a need for a male body. As stated with Astrid, growing up a woman in a middle eastern household was very tough, and Faya was a very tomboy type of girl which led to a lot of confusion. Her family would claim her to be the 'son her father always wanted' and thus Seth took on that role.Seth can get along with anyone and find any common ground to discuss with anyone in any group. He can befriend any gender, social group, and age which makes him the most equipped when meeting new people or being in large crowds. He’s very good at adjusting his personality to those around him. He does enjoy social events, including parties which tend to give the other Partisans, Commanders, and Primaries anxiety.In spite of all of that, Seth does get anxiety around his accent. Being that he is one of the only ones that displays it, he has issues speaking with it out loud out of fear of judgment. Faya has been practicing her accent so when they are co-con together, he can speak it fluently and without issue.Seth adores food, video games, comic books, dumb comedies, drinking alcohol, and attending parties.

Orion - The Ardent

The Ardent, Partisan, Guardian, Accomplice.Sin's Opposite.Orion is the integration of Nova and Silas. As both were Ardents, they felt it wasn't necessary to have two in the Collective.Orion's name comes from Greek Mythology meaning Rising in the sky; dawning.They have one brown, and one orange eye, very dark skin, and large curly opal blue hair. Their nose is very cute, with large lips. Enjoys wearing baggy clothing, like Nova, but also enjoys wearing 'anime' style baggy clothing.Orion is a very peppy person, which can be strange as Nova and Silas were not. Like Nova, Orion is the 'emotional' hub of the entire aggregate. Is able to feel what all the other alters are feeling, and assist them in whatever way they can.They're still new, and not quite sure what they enjoy yet but we're learning about them every day.

Nova - The Ardent

The Ardent, Partisan, Guardian, Accomplice.Sin's Opposite.Nova refers to a 'creation of a star'. A dark skinned woman with large curly black hair, which she'll sometimes switch up into having braids or locks. Large eyes, one brown, the other light brown or orange depending on the light. Wears baggy clothing, sweaters and sweatpants. A small bump on her nose, and large lips. Will wear shorts, or ripped jeans with a t-shirt and long sleeves underneath. She does not speak with an accent. Nova speaks English.A strong emotional part of our Aggregate. Nova can feel what everyone inside is feeling and translate it in ways that they can understand as to not be overwhelmed. She is very meek, and talks quietly when she is speaking to someone outside the Nerd Herd. Do not confuse her shyness and quiet demeanor for lack of strength. Even though Nova is not physically strong, she is emotionally stronger than anyone within the Ensemble.As mentioned, she feels emotions which means she has the tendency to tear up when she feels anyones sadness or pain, making it hard for her to keep a straight face when talking about someone within the Nerd Herd or when speaking about anything painful.Nova is very resourceful. She can figure out how to use anything for other purposes that can benefit her and the Nerd Herd. An example is she will use Lily as a way to learn about why people are feeling pain as they will open up about their sadness and fears to a child who will not judge them, and Lily will reiterate this information to Nova so she can figure out how to help them with their emotional needs.Nova is very effective with her methods and she is incredibly patient with everyone. She can patiently wait for months at a time to assist someone with their emotional needs. Her patience makes her prime to dealing with the Slights Lily, and Noah.Nova, along with the rest of the Nerd Herd, adore the Slights and their innocence. She will protect them at all costs and feeling their sadness and pain hits her quite a bit harder for her than anyone else. She will play with them and make sure they are well kept with their needs. Nova will also nourish, pamper, entertain, and spoil everyone in the Nerd Herd but again, has a soft spot for the Slights.Nova enjoys watching Romantic Comedies, playing sudoku, jigsaw puzzles with Kino, and playing with the Slights.

Sin - The savior

Saviour.Orions's Opposite.Sin meaning 'Moon' in Aramaic or a transgression of God. Speaks with a very heavy Russian accent. Standing at 5'6 with a very strong build. Wears dark makeup, and a black choker. Sin speaks English, and Russian.Like Seth, the first thing you will notice about Sin is her accent, followed by her very tough exterior. She is also very different from anyone within with the Nerd Herd as she can mask any emotion she is feeling, leaving her with a poker face. She does not enjoy pop culture, and turns frustrated when that is all anyone will talk about.

Speaking of things to talk about, Sin does not enjoy conversation with anyone. She likes to sit in silence with her peers, people watching, or out doing exercise. Sin has been classified a sociopath by many, as she feels very little emotion towards people in general.Although she has a tough exterior, don’t assume that she does have emotions. She is very protective of everyone, including those that Faya and Astrid consider important. She is very physical and will disarm anyone who dares harm the vessel or the Nerd Herd. She is physically strong, and can take down anyone who dares show any violence towards us.Although she can take anyone in a fight, it does not mean she will ever instigate or attack anyone unprovoked. Her ‘job’ or ‘title’ is to end the fight so we can escape, not continue fighting or look for danger.Sin loves to exercise, practice her fighting, and play with the Slights. She is into fitness and healthy eating, making sure Faya and Astrid stick to some sort of healthy regime to keep the vessel going. She can grow frustrated with them when they eat junk food a lot, but they are working on it collectively.She does not make any big decisions within the group, but will keep an eye out for anything that may cause us harm. If we are ever having a bad day or ‘switching’ she will lead the charge, and stay towards the ‘front’ as to protect the vessel from any danger, if any presents itself.She enjoys card games, puzzles, watching romantic comedies, hiking, looking out at scenery, and flowers.

Willow - The carnal

Carnal, Guardian, Partisan.Lily's Opposite.Willow meaning 'Slender' or 'Graceful' in English. A Ukrainian appearing woman with no accent. Standing at 5’7, thin, tall build. Enjoys wearing colours and dresses. No piercings, or tattoos. Willow speaks English, and Arabic and understands Ukranian but cannot speak it.You may see Willow as a victim of sexual trauma, but she is so much more than that. She is a very integral part of the Aggregate, experiencing things that only she is equipped to handle. Willow is very emotionally strong, even if it is a little stunted due to her experiences.

Willow was hidden away for almost 6 years as no trauma happened during that time, and once revealed she began to explore her needs through therapy and collectively with the Nerd Herd. Even though her interactions with people, especially men, were traumatic, she is very personable, able to get along with just about anyone who comes into her life. She adores people, loves interacting with them, and attending parties with pop music.Described as a ‘basic bitch’ as she so claims, she loves frappuccinos, fall weather, and pop music. She is very confident on the outside with her decisions and whom she is interacting with but has issues keeping up her confidence during harder times.She adores the Slights, as she is someone with trauma, she enjoys being around those with lots of innocence. She will play with them, burning out their energy and giving Orion a break once in a while from being their Guardian.Willow started out as a fragment at a very young age and evolved over the years into her own person, with wants, and needs, like everyone else. Although her life hasn’t had the most positive experiences, we are working collectively to give her happy memories, like going to the Zoo and eating different foods.She enjoys watching romantic comedies, and horror movies. Loves to do puzzles and play hide and seek with the Slights. She enjoys shopping, and attending parties with alcohol.

Quinn - The Surveyor

The Surveyor, Partisan, Accomplice.Silas’s Opposite.Quinn meaning either 'Intellect' or 'Chief' from Irish Origin. Formally known as Ghost, the first thing you’ll notice about them is that they’re mute. Quinn does not speak, but they do know sign language, and can write quite quickly in order to communicate. They use they/she pronouns.Quinn was unknown to everyone for a very long time. They are terrified of loud sounds, noises, and fast moving lights. They have issues feeling safe, and will run, and hide when they hear loud sounds, which is why it has been hard for anyone to find them.

They have the ability to hide in plain sight due to their silence. Because of this, they have mapped out the whole Ensemble, including everyone’s stations. They are very adequate when it comes to their ability to put their views onto paper.They don’t enjoy being around people very much, as they can be very loud but she does enjoy cats, as they can be very quiet and easy to get along with. They can observe everything going on from a distance, and that’s currently how they prefer to live.Quinn will damage the vessel when they are forced to the front due to the overwhelming sounds and lights, causing them to summon someone else to the front. This will usually happen when the vessel is feeling ‘switchy’ and no one can get to the ‘drivers’ seat. They will do whatever they have to, to escape the front. Also the only way they knew how to communicate to everyone was to hurt the body, as they were too afraid to speak or leave them notes.Due to Quinn’s silence, we don’t have a lot of information on them at this time, but we are learning more about them everyday.

Kama - The safeguard

Safeguard.Aria's Opposite.Kama meaning 'Sythe' in Japanese. Wears a long, black cloak. Covers most of her head, large black eyes. Very demon-like presence. As she walks, it looks as though she is floating, moving from area to area flawlessly.Faya ended up naming her Kama. Although she was called the ‘Gatekeeper’ for many years before Faya knew about the Nerd Herd, she guards the doors that lead to everyone’s memories. Her job is very specific and prevents anyone from seeing memories that are not their own.Like Kino, and Astrid, Kama is a no-nonsense type of person. She is very smart, organized, caring, and specific. She does not explore around in the head space, and stays guarding the doors.Kama is Faya’s opposite, meaning she is very quiet, and self reliant. Along with that she is introverted, cautious, and reserved. She enjoys watching the Slights play, avoiding any activity.Her purpose is very specific, and cannot be done by anyone else. She is an integral part of the Aggregate as without her, memories would not be organized well and chaos would ensue. Although she organizes the memories, she does not see them or experience anything other than her own memories.Kama has not had a chance to experience much outside the Collective so her likes and things she uses for entertainment are limited. She enjoys the sun, laying outside on the grass, watching the Slights run and play, playing card games with Kino and Orion.

Lily - The slight

A Slight.Willow's Opposite.Lily's name is from a type of flower. A small blonde haired girl. Wears her hair in low pigtails, front bangs straight across her forehead. Big cheekbones, large smile. Bright brown eyes, pink cheeks. Missing tooth on the bottom left. Her age will not be disclosed.Described as a happy go lucky kid, Lily is the happiest kid you will ever meet. Having never experienced any trauma, she can enjoy life in a carefree manner. She may be a child, but she is not naive. She knows when someone is upset or not feeling well, using her happy charm to turn their sour mood around.Most things are kept private from Lily, but they will disclose as much information to her as possible. Orion acts like her ‘mother’ but she does not call her ‘mom’ or ‘mommy’. She is taken care of by being put to bed at appropriate times, staying clean, and supervised when she is ‘fronting’.Most of the Nerd Herd will expose their feelings to Lily, as she is very innocent and will not judge them for their issues. She is the internal gossip and will relay the information to whomever can assist. She learns things about everyone, and keeps everyone updated on everyone else’s situations.She’s also very playful, dragging whomever around to play with her and Noah whenever she can. She loves to play hide and seek with everyone, along with chilling in the speakeasy with some apple juice.Lily enjoys coloring with Noah, running around, playing tag and hide and seek, doing puzzles with the Nerd Herd, and watching silly comedy movies.

Silas - the Concord

Quinn's Opposite.Silas meaning 'the youngest' in Aramaic and Hebrew. Silas is a very tall, thin man with long, shaggy, blue hair, reaching just above his shoulders. He's quite pale, with large dark blue eyes. His features are quite slender, long arms, fingers, and legs. He enjoys wearing baggy pants, with a black or white t shirt, a long cloak over top, and tall dark boots. Silas can be described as someone who looks like an anime character.Silas hypes everyone up as much as he can. He tries to make it so everyone in the Nerd Herd is encouraged to follow their ambitions.Described as the Concord, he has issues being around the Nerd Herd when they are depressed as he can feel what they do so he tends to hide from us a lot. While he's out, he has issues keeping his emotions in check as he is very empathetic.As Silas has bright hair, he has issues hiding in plain site, so he will hide in the back part of the brain to prevent anyone from finding him but he does enjoy being around people a lot which can be very hard for him.Because he hides a lot Silas will do a lot of gardening, trying to create a wonderfully calm place for everyone to enjoy. Currently everyone has been using Lily's island but she doesn't like it very much so he has been working on a mutual place.Unclear as to what he currently enjoys, we believe he likes clubbing, going to concerts, watching TV documentaries, and gardening.

Noah - the slight

A Slight.Astrid’s Opposite.Noah meaning 'Repose' or 'Rest'. A small brown haired boy front bangs straight across her forehead. Big cheekbones, large smile. Bright brown eyes, pink cheeks. Her age will not be disclosed.Noah is a child who carries a lot of unpleasant memories, and due to this he is very quiet and reserved, hiding from everyone. He enjoys to beat around the bush when he speaks, as it seems to be a sort of game for himUnlike Astrid, Noah is terrified of the outside world. He harbors unpleasant memories, and this causes him to avoid fronting or coming out. He was considered Lily’s ‘imaginary’ friend for many years as he would hide from everyone to avoid coming to the outside world.Lily has been playing with Noah more, bringing him further out of his shell. He is a very reserved, quiet child who likes to watch people and sit at a distance. Though he is a child, do not assume he is not intelligent. Noah understands emotions at a level that you would not predict from a child. His experiences have given him insight into people that not even adults could fathom.Noah is currently experiencing new things outside of his trauma, like food, and playing with animals. He is enjoying himself even though it has been a very slow process. Lily and Orion are currently working with him at a calm pace to help him experience the world in a brighter light.Noah likes to read, colour, play hide and seek, people-watch, and sit in fields watching the sunset.